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thirteen_2_nine
24 October 2007 @ 01:37 am
I started seeing a homeopathic doctor back in August for my slightly fucked up skin, because my Keratosis Pilaris was at an all-time yuck-level, and I wondered if homeopathy would do something that regular doctors and derms couldn't.

My homeopathic doctor is adorable and better than any counselor and I totally ♥ her. She also prescibed me some pills (made of snake venom or something weird.)

I can't belive I didn't *click* when I started rapidly gaining weight, like, two days after I took those pills.

She has now reassured me that the extra poundage will go without any effort on my part once her treatment is complete.

*phew!* That IS good news.

But in the meantime I'm hovering at thirteen stone no matter what I do.

Short of starving myself and/or running myself to death on a treadmill I think I'm kind of stuck there.

It sucks that I'm making no improvement with my weight even though I have been trying to eat a bit more sensibly, but at least I know why - and that it isn't forever.

I'm still concerned with my alcohol intake though.

Alcohol = More poundage, but I can't seem to kick the habit of throwing back the booze.

I must drink my daily allowance of calories - never mind the food!

I'm getting scared that I have a real problem with alcohol, because I can't bear to stay away from it. Fuck.
 
 
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: The Enemy - You're not alone
 
 
thirteen_2_nine
11 September 2007 @ 08:56 pm
Today I didn't do too bad... for me. (Considering that I usually eat like a starved hog.)

8am
Coffee with milk and one sweetener.
One slice of toast with marmite.

10am
A banana.
Bottle of water.

1pm
Pasta with tomato and spinach (tiny bowl - only 300 calories.)
A banana.
Bottle of water.

4pm
An apple.
A small chunk of Gouda and four crackers.
Bottle of water.

7pm
Bowl of butternut squash, tomato, garlic, onion and haricot bean soup. (Sounds kind of gross, tasted great.)

8pm
Green tea.
A dozen black olives.


My friend's brother told me that drinking lots of water is the best thing I can do to lose weight. Because according to him, half the time when we think we are hungry and feed our faces - actually all our bodies want is some water. Plus, water can fill a small hungry space that I would otherwise fill with junk.
 
 
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
Current Music: Garbage - Cherry Lips
 
 
thirteen_2_nine
04 September 2007 @ 12:00 am
Thirteen stone! I weigh thirteen stone!

13 stone!

*cries*

Crap. How have I managed to get so damn overweight without really noticing?

I mean, I was aware than I'm not exactly sylph-like anymore, but I hadn't realised I'd morphed into a baby hippo!

So... reasons...

1#

Working in a plus-size clothing shop for the last two and a half years probably does not help me. I spend a hefty percentage of my days surrounded by large, larger and very large women - and thus end up feeling quite slim by comparison. (But it is only by comparison.)

But even that doesn't work as a complete excuse.

2#

But the recent trend for leggings and smock tops have done me no favours either because there was nothing there to restrict my expansion!

If this season was all about skinny jeans and tight tees, I'd have felt my clothes getting tighter - and I might have clued in earlier that I was getting even bigger.

Basically though. Bottom line is:

3#

I'm greedy and I eat and drink fatty calorie laden junk.

I think this is the point at which I have to accept that if I want to be slim, healthy, beautiful and attractive to men then I have to give up gorging myself silly on all the rubbish I love to eat.

I'm not seventeen anymore (unfortunately) and my body can no longer cope with running on as much as 7,000 calories a day and still stay skinny.

I can't have both, so I have to choose between two things that mean a lot to me.

So, option one: Keep on eating delicious crap and not exercising and get fatter, unhealthier... and probably never get a date ever again... and have to shop in plus-size shops myself 0_o

Or option two: Start dieting, exercising and generally cutting out 90% of the crap, and lose weight and be sexy... have the confidence to chat up hot men... and be confident that my beloved TopShop jeans will continue to fit my ass.

Hmm. Choices. Choices.
 
 
Current Mood: determineddetermined
Current Music: Lola - The Kinks